Lean into love

We are all guilty of going through certain aspects of our lives on autopilot repeating the same thinking cycles and behaviours. 

If we want to move forward in an area of our life we need to shine a light on it and look at our thoughts and how they might be holding us back.

Let’s play a little thought experiment of mine. Let us simply imagine that our actions and behaviours come from one of two states: love or fear. 

Now think about your life in four categories:

1.       Friendships

2.       Intimate relationships

3.       Career

4.       The outside world

Firstly, think about friendship.  What recent memories comes up?

Think of recent scenarios and ask yourself – were your words and actions emanating from a place of love or fear?

Then think about a recent scenario in your private life and ask yourself the same question – was I being driven by love or fear?

Do the same with your career.

Now, do the same with your recent feelings about the state of the world.

Reflect.

What came up for you?

Where have you spent most of your time recently - functioning from a state of love or fear?

If fear is in the driving seat it can really hold you back from what you want to achieve in life.

The state of fear can:

·       keep us playing small

·       keep us procrastinating

·       Stop us from evolving and growing

·       Limit our potential

·       Feel hopeless

If any fear has come up for you, bring this into your awareness.  Notice the story or stories that this fear is attached to.

The first thing we do is notice.  Self-awareness is the starting place for positive change.     

The tool we can use when we feel we are functioning from a fear state is to mentally move into a love state.

Let's take an example, maybe your loved one initiates some romance and it is met with resistance inside of you. Calmly ask yourself whether this resistance is fear or love manifesting itself.  Oftentimes it is fear that is holding us back, a fear linked back to our story.  If you can recall the story or event, send love to yourself and gently ask to receive this romantic request now from a place of safety, love and gratitude and see if the resistance still holds or if there is a release.

Experiment with this idea.   Try leaning into the love state and letting that drive you forward.  Will it lead to some forward momentum in your life?

This exercise will help you notice thought patterns that limit you.  

It will make you more receptive to new experiences and to seeing the world through a more positive lens. 

Fear is contagious and spreads like wildfire.  When you hear your thoughts spill out of your mouth think to yourself - are they coming from a place of love or a place of fear?  What energy am I spreading?

The good news? The love state is also contagious!  Good news stories and laughter spreads too.

Here are some useful strategies to keep us in the love state:

·       Watch comedy! Work on making yourself laugh

·       Play your happy music

·       Turn off negative news

·       Don’t encourage or continue negative conversations

·       Hunt for positive news stories, find evidence of love and hope

·       Link up with friends and family that lift us up.  Don’t see friends that drag you down

·       Welcome human to human connection

·       Help others less fortunate than yourself

·       Self-care

Keep on noticing what state is in the driving seat of your life and if it doesn’t serve you - flip it! 

Let me know how it goes!

** if fear is your dominant emotion you may need professional support, please reach out to someone you trust.